The Cycle of Twin Flame Separation and Connection Between Twin Flames

by richee on June 7, 2012 · 1 comment

twin flame reunion

The Cycle of Twin Flame Separation and Connection Between Twin Flames


If you have met your twin flame, you are likely to have experienced the frustrating “twin flame dance” where you swing back and forth between connecting then withdrawing during the cycle of twin flame separation. This can be very confusing to the twin flames and also it can be very painful if they do not understand the divine purpose of this cycle.

However, many factors contribute for the NEED for this cycle:


1) Firstly I would say that if either of you aren’t ready to unite, it is because you’re not supposed to be ready – it’s not the right time.

Pointing the finger and blaming the other twin means you are not ready yourself either. Acceptance is needed and the ability to become whole within yourself and not feel the need for your twin flame to fill any voids in your life or heart. This has been said so many times, but it is very important to take the time to fully understand this. If you are looking to the other in order to feel love, it means you are not looking to yourself first. This void you have within will only be reflected back to you by your twin flame. It means you can’t unite because there are gaps you need to fill in yourselves so that you can reflect wholeness back to each other and your split can be healed. If you were to join when you are not whole, you would live in eternity with great pain still remaining.


2) The twin flame separation happens because you haven’t reached unconditional love and acceptance for yourself and your twin.

Sometimes it is very difficult to not get caught up in your own views, emotions, ideals and forget that your twin has their own view of things. Often it is the ego that stands in the way; you just can’t seem to agree on anything. This is because you are both coming to the same conlusions from the opposite angles. Remember the mirror; You are the counterpart, the opposite yet identicle energy vibrations. You work together through love, but come to it from opposite sides. The result is still the same though – love.

It is the ego though, that causes us to feel that the other is doing it “all wrong”. We say to ourselves, “If he/she loved me, then he/she would show it the way I am showing it.” We conclude that if our twin doesn’t express themselves the same way as us, then they just don’t love us. We begin to regard them as cold, heartless and even cruel.

My own thinking used to be so one-sided. I believed he was messing me around and playing me for a fool. I felt extremely hurt and in turn acted in ways which hurt him. Blinded by my own fear of losing him and trying to “prove” his love, I hadn’t thought once about how I was hurting him (and I must say looking back, i was doing pretty much the same things to him that he was doing to me, but in a mirrored fashion). I also never even considered the fact that deep down I knew I wasn’t ready to unite at that time either – all my focus was on him – he wasn’t doing this, he wasn’t doing that and it hurt my pride so much that the painful rejection is all i could think of. I tried to protect myself by shutting down. I chased him, but in a way that made out it was all some trivial game of power. He tried to protect himself by trying to make me chase him (to prove to himself my love for him), then doing the same as I was.

The major factor that we fail to miss though, is that many of the negative behaviour is caused by FEAR, which leads me onto my next point:

3) Twin flames separate because at first the connection feels”crazy”. It threatens all that we think we know about the way the world works.

You bump into your twin flame for the first time. Boom! Something happens, you know this person somehow even though you don’t recognise them on a physical level. You feel such intense love, but you wonder how this can be so when you don’t know them. You conclude it’s just lust, but why is there that knowing feeling deep in your soul? You know your life has changed forever, you can just sense it, but you don’t have a clue why. Then you can’t stop thinking about this person ALL THE TIME, re-living times when you saw him/her over and over and over. The love you feel for this person incereases over time when you think logically it should fade. You can’t stop fantasising about them, being distracted by thinking of them to the point that you cannot concentrate on anything else. You just feel scared. Scared of losing this person somehow. Scared you have already lost them. Scared because you don’t even know them and that it means you are crazy to feel such intensity.

So you “run” from it. You try to block it out and convince yourself it’s just lust. You’ve been taught by society that it’s unhealthy to pine after someone for too long, therefore you try your hardest to forget all about him/her. But you can’t. You try your hardest, but you just can’t. Then you bump into him/her again unexpectedly and all those feelings flood back to you. All your hard work to try and kill these feelings goes down the drain and within a second you are back to square one. Tie this in with all the reflected fear, arguments, confusion and it all gets even more scary. Sometimes it just feels safer to run away and hope it all just disappears…

It’s understandable (or at least it should be) that fear is going to present itself in this situation. It’s a fight or flight situation and often twin flames run. But remember, this running is needed in order for them to have the distance to MAKE SENSE of it all. Granted, it could take years, but the point is, if you or your twin flame are “running”, then it is because this is part of your life path – to get the distance to make sense of this new reality.

It’s to do with overcoming the ego. It takes time. It’s as if we have to reprogram ourselves to learn to live from soul consciousness rather than ego consciousness. It won’t come over night. We have incarnated possibly hundreds of times, living in our egos. We can’t expect ourselves or our twins to suddenly flick a switch and be back to living fully in our soul consciousness.

4) Twin flames reconnect for reassurance.

They want to know you are still there. They want to test if you still love them because they definately know they love you, but are scared it is just one-sided and you’ve “gotten over” them. Of course they’ll deny it though.

5) Twin flames reconnect to heal each other.

Through the cycle of separation and connection, the twin flames are often destined to meet up in the physical several times in order to heal each other. When a stage of healing within each individual is complete, they will meet again to connect and expand each other in energy (love) which they will then need to separate again to “process”. It’s as if they meet up to recieve a challenge. Once they know what the challenge is (subconsciously) they both go their separate ways to achieve it. Once achieve, they recieve that healing and go onto the next.

6) We separate from our twin flames when we have individual karma to be balanced.

Karma – the cause and effect cycle created by us through our lifetimes needs to be balanced before we can unite with our twin flames. Before we incarnated into this lifetime, and any other lifetime, our souls made agreements with other souls to meet on the physical plane and learn lessons from each other. They may be tough lessons, wonderful lessons but all will be helpful in the end. By this I mean that eventually, even if we percieve a situation to be negative, we will always learn a positive from it. All karma must be fulfilled by the intividual twins before they can come back together again in unity.

7) We (may) separate from our twin flames when we are destined to be in other relationships.

Through connecting with your twin flame, you will feel increased love in your soul as long as you are able to put ego aside. Oftentimes we may marry a soul mate in order to share this increased love with them to help them awaken too. OR we may already be in another relationship when we meet our twin flame. This relationship will help us learn about love in order to prepare us for our twin flame. Either way, we learn from our soulmates and they learn from us.

8) We separate so we aren’t distracted from our individual awakening.

If we were together all the time before reunion occurred, we would remain reflecting our own voids that we need to heal individually. We would also not be able to balance our separate karma with others and would not have the yearning for each other as a catalyst to greater spiritual searching.

So you see, the cycle of separation and connection is NEEDED in order for us to fully heal, awaken and fulfil our mission to help humankind through our knowledge and light. We must all accept the journey towards reunion as JUST AS IMPORTANT as union itself. To unite too quickly before we are ready would leave us unfulfilled and unhealed.

We must accept ourselves and be aware of the twin flame signs and not blame each other for not being ready NOW. It’s all part of the process; it’s all part of the path we agreed upon before birth. ACCEPT your path and yourselves and it will all come to you in perfect time.




twin flame separation

{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

dhabhareye EN. dubleyew January 28, 2013 at 1:43 am

twin flames are not controlled by some higher power, like all other human beings on this earth they have free will and free choice.
if he or she choses to move away from thier TF and live life without TF in it, for whatever reason then its their issue. let them go. and move on.
if youre tf is a psychopath who has serious committed live-in relationships with others has loving and intimate relationships and yet wont let you go he is a stalker.
no amount of TF rationlization, about being eternally connected, about unbreakable bonds , divine partnership, godgodess are a viable excuses. NONE.
If you are with someone else then let your twin go. let the twin GO. you do or you dont do. remember????????
we all know that its not the destination thats important- its the journey. and the TF is not meant to be part of the journey. only those who count are. those you live with, learn with grow with. Those who share your daily expereinces in life and love . the destination is just but a moment in time. its a grand momnet but the glory goes to the journey, the ups the downs all the people weve loved, been frineds with, those who have been at our side through thick and thin, the hard times, the happy times.
Really who needs some obscure theoretical person that youre not meant to know be with, be friends with, or talk to. thats just ridiculous. devalue all the soulmates karmic mates, firneds lovers, family who have been with us throughout, lifetime after lifetitme? and glorify some person who is this divine partner who we will only meet for a minute in the great sphere of eternity? if those of you who have a TF whose worth a damn then i guess the experience is different. even if its hard its worth it becuase there is respect and dignity. any hardships are then gristmill to the soul. its a love worth living for worth suffering for worth dying for.
Certainly, BUT not when its treated like some cheesy sideshow on some obscure cable channel. anything is worth it if there is respect. unfortuantely this colosssal lack of respepct has been my experience. I was starry eyed in the beginning, all ready for theis exciting experience, everything i had read about sounded , incredible, like an amazing adventure of learning and discovery. instead, i am called names, taunted laughed at, name called, ssexually abused and mentally emaotionally and psychically abused by my TF . i am messed with every second of everyday. ive tried. when i look back i cant imagine how i have endured and survived all the horrific stuff he did to me. all with a laugh and a smile. devoid of respepct its just a joke. eeven if tis TF, and from what ive read this is anything but a joke. ive alaso read that it is impossible to sever ties. and i refuse to believe this because there is nothing more I would love, to have this divine relationship, I am in, totally and completely in . but to waste my time energy, my humanity and my divinity on someone who is determined, i mean DETERMINED to ridicule me and ridicule this situation is imsply not worth it . i am willing to start over. I am wiling to go back to the start till i find the right person. i refuse to belive that this is what ive been dealt and i have no say in the matter. i am putting this in writing because I mean it. nothing is worth this… if youve got a raw deal. slut, bitch and retard i am NO MORE. i deserve a divine partner who would not breathe those words in realtion to me. ever. that is my sacred vow. over and out


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